Random Musings

It's been a few days since my last post (when Chase was discharged) and the family has been enjoying some "together time" in anticipation of Chase's surgery tomorrow. I'm finding it hard, especially this morning, that each time I do something (change his diaper, nurse him, give a bottle, kiss his forehead, tickle him 'til he giggles), that it will be the last time I get to do that something for several days. I haven't begun thinking about physically turning him over to the surgical team in the morning... I'll probably wait until later tonight or tomorrow morning to officially begin to get worked up about this next surgery. On the one hand, I'm looking forward to it because it's going to relieve some stress from his heart after the circulatory changes are completed with this procedure, he'll be healthier and able to do "normal baby" stuff (like meet his family and church friends!). On the other hand, I'm a mommy and it obviously scares me to death to know my baby is having his chest opened and heart replumbed again. We'll have several days of recovery, of watching my baby lie in his bed in the PCICU completely doped up on pain meds to keep him comfortable, a breathing tube down his throat, IVs and lines everywhere... I know what to expect this time around, but it surely won't make it any easier. The first time around, he was my newborn baby: so tiny, precious and new. This time around, he's my son: a melancholy personality, full of smiles and giggles who likes to be comforted in mommy's arms. I know him. He's part of our family. He makes our family complete. This will be hard.

We haven't been given anything "official" in writing or anything that says his surgery is scheduled for tomorrow; but we heard it from several reputable sources (including the surgeon Dr. Bradley). We also have to take Chase to MUSC at noon today for some pre-op blood work and possibly some other tests (echo, x-ray, etc.). And the fact that they discontinued his aspirin last week all add up (to me, anyway) to mean that his surgery is a go for tomorrow.

Now, hubs and I haven't had an opportunity to sit down with Dr. Bradley and discuss the surgery yet. We don't know how long it will take, what exactly he plans to accomplish, what risks are involved, etc. As far as we know, there isn't a meeting scheduled yet for this to happen. I can't imagine it will be first thing tomorrow morning before his surgery... Hubs and I have some questions we'll want to ask as well, so we're expecting some kind of meeting will be scheduled prior to his surgery.

((On a related note, I just got a phone call from MUSC Admissions calling to confirm Chase's information for his procedure tomorrow... Guess we're on!))

Please be praying for my sweet baby boy as he prepares to go in for another life-saving operation. My hope and prayer is that his recovery this time around will be much quicker and easier than his first surgery when he was 7 days old. I will keep everyone updated on things here, and on Twitter and Facebook.

Oh, and I also plan to write a post explaining the Bidirectional Glenn procedure so you all will know a little bit about what is going to happen during the surgery.

Thanks in advance for your thoughts and prayers!